she will tie the knot.

Cuti seminggu cam tak cukup.hoh.cuti sebulan pun takkan pernah cukup.feel little bit lost.lost.lost.lost myself.rasa macam2.feel a lot like the first time in uitm shah alam.feel a lot like the first time met stone cold.feel a lot like wanna go home. nekadnya dan tanak buat intersesi boleh tak? feel a lot like wanna hug stone cold. Missing him like crazy. Fell like wanna cut myself to death. Tanak idup dah. hidup susah mati pun susah..mati pegang bendela..!!

Anyhoo, a lot has happened like one of my best girlfriends has decided to tie the knot..

ok. these are my best girlfriends back in kampung. yg num 1 tu yg nak kawin..

And here is the plan ; they will get married in this coming December. However, the future husband will leave her for an overseas’ duty. Right after kahwin. Hmm, I don’t really know who that guy is. Tak pernah jumpa. Tau pun nama je. Actually, I don’t really agree with the plan. You see, we are only 20 and we have lots of things to figure out in the future. Lots of things to accomplish. Cam cepat sangat. Dia pun baru je kenal that guy. Setahun pun belum sampai kot.

I feel really insecure. Honestly I don’t trust that guy. Bukan lelaki tu je. Semua.

Tapi tak berani nak cakap kat dia. Bila dah cinta, sayang, kentut pun wangi. tak payah cakap.tak payah halang. Lautan api pun sanggup ku renangi. Apa jua ku lakukan demimu kekasihku. Eceh. Nnti dah putus mulalah..

(my brother baru putus cinta. Bercinta bagai nak rak. Adik dengan girlfriend, lebihkan girlfriend. Benci..)

But then, bila fikir balik, why do I have to feel insecure on behalf of her? Dia tahu apa yang dia nak. Dia tahu apa yang dia buat. Dia kenal sapa boyfriend dia. Tapi fikir balik plak, she’s my best friend. I do have to worry about her. Ni hal besar bukan main2. bila tanya nekad ke nak tunang? Dia jawab entahlah. Boleh?

And I ask her again , kenapa nak kahwin dengan dia..

Dia jawab, “because I love him. Aku sayang dia. Tapi macam terlalu muda la plak..”

See the answers? macam tak sure. Then, mulalah aku keluarkan peluru berpandu bebelan aku..aku pun cakap..

“luv is one thing. muda is one thing. love is love no matter you are old or young. but commitment is not easy to deal with when you are too young to be burden with it. I mean the commitment to be a wife. It’s not a burden actually, it’s a responsibility. to be married is not just for today, its for a lifetime, hopefully. what am i going to say is if you are not ready to be in commitment as a wife just dont go with it. hold on. if he luvs you, then there wud be no probs..”

lepas tu dia cakap. Tengok la dulu..

hhhaiiiii..sigh…! susah nak cakap dengan org yg tengah mabuk asemara ni..

anyway, I had a very fabulous holiday. Walaupun hanya dok rumah and sit for baby izreen everyday. Biasala kan bila dah jadi baby sitter ni semua pun kena buat. Mandikan, bagi makan, tidurkan dia, tukar lampin, main dengan dia. Walaupun dia sangat nakal dan suka gigit. Dia gigit org lepas tu dia sengih. Nakal yang amat. Dia paling suka kucing. Dia nak sentuh, tapi takut. Lepas tu mulalah dia gelak2 geram cam tu. Nakal gila. Bangun tidur je dia sengih nakal dia tu. Dan dia suka lagu beautiful girl sean Kingston tu. Kan ada iklan hotlink yg hiburkan pemanggil anda tu. Iklan pasal caller ringtone yang ada sorang lelaki rambut ala2 keringting tu. Yg hensem tu. Hehe.main je lagu tu, pling dia terus toleh ke tv. Lepas tu dia gerak2 badan dia ala2 nak nari kan.sambil kepala terhangguk-hangguk. Nak bangun tak bleh. Dia tak bleh jalan lagi. Dahsyat dia punya interest. Hehe.

Dia sangat membahagiakan hati aku. Tak makan nasi pun rasa kenyang.

tapi tu la, keseronokan woudn't last forever.. kan?

sigh..

quote of the day :

I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work.

- Thomas Alva Edison